Every good and godly marriage we see in our society today, is as a result of the hardwork and intentional efforts of both parties.
We must realise that a good or godly marriage is a product of a godly relationship. A godly relationship is the foundation of a godly marriage.
If the relationship is not well-built, it will lead to problems in future marriage (that is even if it eventually leads to marriage).
The marriage of every child of God is of utmost importance to our Heavenly Father, the Originator of marriage. God is very interested in our relatanships, as much as He is interested in other areas of our lives.
A godly relationship is one that has its foundation in God, and gets its Instructions from Him.
Who can you get the best and most productive tips on building a godly relationship, apart from God Himself?
Matthew 19:26 (KJV)But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible.
Many people believe that it is impossible to have a perfect relationship (or a godly one), but I want to assure you that you can build a godly relationship. It is possible, as long as you seek God's help to do so.
How To Build A Godly Relationship
Below are biblical tips on how a Christian can build a godly relationship before marriage.
1. You Should Be Godly
The first thing to do if you intend to build a godly relationship is that you have to be a godly individual. You have to love godliness. Not living a fake life or having a outward form of godliness.
- You have to genuinely give your heart to God
- You have to be baptised in the Holy Spirit
- Also, allow the Holy Spirit manifest Himself through you
- Live a life of dedication to God.
Only then can you attract a godly person and together, build a godly relationship.
2. Be Prepared To Build A Godly Relationship
As Believers, we must be prepared and ready if we want the best out of anything, including our relationships. You have to be ready to give your best into building your relationship.
Luke 14:28-30 (AMP)For which of you, wishing to build a farm building, does not first sit down and calculate the cost [to see] whether he has sufficient means to finish it? Otherwise, when he has laid the foundation and is unable to complete [the building], all who see it will begin to mock and jeer at him, Saying, This man began to build and was not able (worth enough) to finish.
Be ready to have someone help you fillfil destiny. Ensure you're emotionally, psychologically, physically, mentally, socially, financially and spiritually ready to go into a godly relationship.
Ask yourself these questions:
- Am I ready to submit to God's method in my relationship?
- Am I ready to love Unconditionally and forgive everytime?
- Am I ready to give to my partner to express my love for him or her?
These and many more questions should be asked.
3. Make God's Word Your Standard
A godly relationship is built by following instructions from God, which are recorded in the holy Bible. Do not settle for anything less than what you've seen in God's word. In your life and relationship, let everything be done in accordance with God's word.
4. Set Boundaries And Stick To Them
One of the characteristics of a godly relationship is boundaries. This is about knowing what to do and what not to do with your partner while you're still in a relationship.
Setting boundaries will help you focus on the important things; it will help you pass a clear and sound Judgement.
People in a godly relationship don't engage in fornication or any act of intimacy before marriage.
Hebrews 13:4 (KJV)Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.
You have to be intentional about ensuring that, there be a limit to what you can do in your relationship with your partner—if you want your relationship to please God.
5. Submit To A Spiritual Authority
It is very important that you and your partner have a spiritual head that you submit and give account to, concerning your relationship.
Let a spiritually mature Believer (one with proofs) help you both to achieve a godly relationship. It actually keeps you both in check, because you can never be too careful.
6. Have Goals And Constantly Pursue Them
It is important to have goals in your relationship. For instance, you both reading a particular number of books within a specified period of time. It helps both of you grow.
7. Evaluate Your Progress
From time to time, check your progress in your life, pursuit of destiny and in your relationship. Assessing this from time to time, helps you know where to adjust and where to improve.
8. Stay Prayerful
It is not a sin, neither is it awkward to pray to God over your relationship. As it is said in 1 Thessalonians, pray without ceasing (1 Thess 5:17).
Prayer helps your discernment. Prayer makes you know the mind of God over that relationship. With prayer, you can prevent what you don't like in your relationship and activate what you like.
Also, ask for the guidance of the Holy Spirit and go on to obey whatever he tells you to do. Don't be too wise or too proud to pray. From time to time, you both can pick a particular time or day to fast, pray and seek God's face over the relationship.
9. Seek More Knowledge
There is always a better way to do what you're doing. If you want to build a godly relationship, give yourself to the teaching of people who have achieved positive results in their own relationships.
Sometimes, the reason why you're not getting it right is because you don't know the right thing to do. Remember that ignorance is a destroyer (Hosea 4:6).
10. Have A Model
This is also a very important step to take. You and your partner should find a godly couple and learn from them. They have a godly marriage because they built a godly relationship.
Go on to apply what they applied that you're sure will also work for you. Thank God that there are quite a number of godly marriages in our society today. Pick at least one of them and do what they did if you want to have what they have.
11. Stay Truthful And Transparent In Your Relationship
One mistake many often make before going into relationships or while in relationships is dishonesty and lying. Remember, nothing built on lies will last or stand the test of time.
Let your partner know what he/she needs to know about your past before they are committed to you. It will save you both from unnecessary hurt, and it will help you know the right thing to do.
Also, let your struggles and weaknesses be known to your partner. Tell each other the truth and avoid keeping dirty secrets.
12. Create Time For Each Other
It is not a sin to have godly fun with your partner. Taking a walk with your partner, going out on dates, buying gifts for your partner is part of being godly.
God is love and His love isn't selfish or self-centered. So, give quality time to your partner for both of you to enjoy the presence of each other.
Take precautions though, be wise and discreet in your dealings with each other, so you don't fall into temptation.
That said, do the things that can make your partner happy. Godly people are also romantic.
13. Support Your Partner's Goals And Aspirations
Ensure you're with the right person and do all you can to help them become a better person, and achieve their goals and dreams in life.
Final Thoughts On Building A Godly Relationship
Conclusively, you have to be intentional about getting it right in your relationship, beause God really wants you to get it right (Jeremiah 29:11).
As you take the above steps in building a godly relationship, you'll discover that the best way to enjoy life is living it according to God's standards.
Beloved, I trust that by reading this article you learned how to build a godly relationship before marriage.
Remain blessed!
